Christmas Card / Letter

Every year since I have been on my own I have mailed out Christmas Cards every year. About 13 years ago I started doing a Christmas letter to include in the card. It would take me forever to find the perfect card to go that year and to write the past year happenings of all 4 of us. In the beginning they were the cheapest cards I could find because that is all I could afford. Then as things in life got better I started buying ones that I actually liked myself. It was always my tradition to sit down Thanksgiving weekend and start addressing the envelopes and then writing personal notes in each and every card. Last year I think I mailed out about 90 cards.

Not only do I enjoy sending this yearly ritual but I also loved receiving them from friends & family. However, in the past most people have stopped sending them or some have never sent a card. This makes me kind of sad. During the holiday season I have always looked forward to reaching into my mail box to see whose card I would receive, opening them up and reading the card. Truly hate that this holiday tradition is going by the wayside like so many other things.

Now that my kids are grown and have their own lives, I think it is time to end the Christmas letter. Not sure yet because I have already started on this year’s Just not sure if I will actually send it out. Have even thought about stopping the Christmas card tradition that I have been doing for 20+ years. I know this is wrong but why should I go through the time and expense of it when some many can't make the same effort.

So I will end this by saying that if you do not receive a Christmas card or letter from me this year, don't take it personal but it just seems to be a waste anymore. May each and every one that reads my blog have a Blessed Christmas and Happy New Year.

Love,

T

Pictures

For as long as I can remember I have loved to take pictures.  I have 1000's of them.  If you really know me, you know that I always have a camera with me.   I take pictures of everything.  Taking pictures are a way for me to capture a memory.  One day I hope to take a photography class so I can learn how to take professional pictures. 

Every time a box comes in the mail, Rob asks what kind of camera, scanner or thingy did you buy now.   He knows me so well.   A new camera to me is like getting a present on Christmas morning.  I can't wait to open it and try it out. 

About a year ago I started scanning all of my photos, my mother's old photos, & her slides.  Just this past weekend I scanned over 500 photos.  It is allot of work but I am really enjoying it.  Are you like most people and take pictures, put them on the computer and forget about them?  Not me, I am always pulling out my photo albums and my digital photos.  

I even took lots of pictures when 35mm film was popular and have 1000's of 35mm pictures.  This project is giving me a chance to look back at some wonderful events in my life.  There is the wonderful memories of my Mom, Christmas mornings, weddings, my family when we actually use to be one, my children at many different stages of their life, and I could go on & on.  

Hoping my project will one day be able to be shared with my family members so they to can go back and remember the wonderful times in their lives.

Tearesa 

Lazy Day!!!

Don't you enjoy those days when you can stay in your PJ's all day long and do absolutely nothing but watch TV and nap. 

I don't get to do it often but when I do I enjoy it so much.  Sometimes I just say I have had enough, I won't do laundry, cook or clean anything for one entire day.  When I do get this joyous day it is usually on a Sunday and during hunting season when everyone is gone for the entire weekend.

Today is one of these days and I am enjoying it so much.  However, tomorrow means I will be a little busier than normal because I will have to do everything that I didn't do today but it is so worth it.

I hope that each of get one of these days once in awhile.

Tearesa

Another Year Older

Next week I will be celebrating my 42nd year on this earth.  Most of the time I don't feel like I am 42 but then there are times when I feel like I am much older.  Unlike many of my friends, I am an empty nestier and trying to find what to do with this new stage of my life.  It has been a hard road the past year but I am determined to make the most of it. 

Every year when I celebrate my birthday I also celebrate another year with Pepsi.  I started with them two days before my 20th birthday.  Yep, that means that I have been working for Pepsi for 22 years as of Oct. 24.

One of the best gifts this week is the celebration of two of my most favorite people in the entire world, my oldest bother Ricky & sister Carman's birthday.  All  3 of us have a birthday within 5 days.  Carman & Ricky I love you both and wish you each a Happy Birthday.

Tearesa

Being an Empty Nester

Where does the time go? 

My heart is heavy with the quietness of my home these days!  Many tears have been shed!

It seems like it was just yesterday that I had two little ones under my feet.  There was never enough time in a day to get it all done.  How often I wished for some quiet time and that my two kids would just get along.

Now, I what I wouldn't do for screaming kids, a messy house and event filled evenings.  After 22 years I am basically a empty nester at the age of age 41.  This transition has been so hard for me.  My first child was born when I was 19 & my second came when I was 22.  At an early age I realized that all I ever wanted to be was a Mom.  My entire adult life has been about taking care of my family and now no one seems to need me anymore.  It is hard to let go and not be needed by two of the most important people in your life.  Finding a new path in life is hard.    Coming home to an empty house every evening is one of the hardest thing I have ever done. 

I could not be more proud of both of my kids.  Jessica has graduated from the University of South Carolina and is a RN in the OR at Lexington Hospital.  She is the first on my side of the family to graduate from college with a 4 year degree.  Justin is going to Midlands Tech for Automotive Technology and works at O'Reilly's.  He is doing what he truly loves, working on cars.

One of the things I have done to better myself is to get a college education.  Last year I got my Associates in Business and next year I will have my Bachelor's in Business.  It has been hard but very rewarding.  I am still trying to decide what I want to do once I graduate.  I have worked for PepsiCo for 22 years but I am not sure if they have anything to offer.  

Have to find something in the evenings to occupy my time.   There is so many things that I want to do but for some reason I just don't make an effort to do them.  Always wanted to learn how to decorate cakes, take a photography class, volunteer at a nursing home, adopt a child, and the list could go on and on.  I am sure that this will pass and I will find my new path.

I found this poem and could relate to it so well:

I didn’t plant these flowers, they are not by my design
I did not know when they would bloom, or that it was their time
These flowers don’t belong to me, but each one is unique
God’s loving hand has molded them and made each one complete
There’s nothing I needed to add to them and nothing to subtract
I only needed to nurture them and keep them on His track
I’ve watered them with love and pulled the weeds of hate
I’d prop them up when they were weak and tried to keep them straight
I’ve fertilized them with faith to keep their roots good and strong
And gently nipped their little leaves when they were growing wrong
These flowers are a gift from God, made with pure love and delight
But it was my job to tend to them with righteousness and might
So keep their heads turned to the skies, their hearts in tune with God
And they will reap eternal life and walk on Heaven’s sod!!!

Tearesa

When Tomorrow Starts Without Me

When tomorrow starts without me, and I'm not there to see,

If the sun should rise and find your eyes, all filled with tears for me,

I wish so much you wouldn't cry, the way you did today,
While thinking of the many things we didn't get to say.
I know how much you love me, as much as I love you,
And each time that you think of me, I know you'll miss me too.
But when tomorrow starts without me, please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name and took me by the hand.
And said my place was ready in Heaven far above,
And that I'd have to leave behind, all those things I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away, a tear fell from my eye,
For all my life, I'd always thought, I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for, so much yet to do,
It seemed almost impossible, that I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays, the good ones and the bad,
I thought of all the love we shared, and all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday, just even for a while,
I'd say goodbye and kiss you, and maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized, that could never be,
For emptiness and memories, would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things, I might miss come tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did, my heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through Heaven's gates, I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at me, from his great golden throne.
He said, "This is eternity, and all I've promised you.
Today your life on Earth is past, and here it starts anew".
"I promise no tomorrow, but today will always last,
And since each day's the same day, there's no longing for the past".
"But you have been so faithful, so trusting and so true,
Though there were times you did some things, you know you shouldn't do".
"But you have been forgiven, and now at last you're free,
So won't you take my hand now and share My life with Me".
So when tomorrow starts without me, don't think we're far apart,
For every time you think of me, I'm right here in your heart.

This is for my best friend whom I lost in Aug of 2001, My Mom.

My Son

My son, Justin, is so amazing.  At the age of 19 he surprises me everyday with his maturity, the decisions he makes and just how he looks at life.  

Next week he will start his 2nd year at Midlands Tech in pursuit of an Associates Degree in Automotive Technology.  While attending school full-time he is also working at O'Reilly's Auto Parts as a RSS (which is kinda like a Asst. Store Mgr).  This semester he will have two days that he will have to attend classes from 8 AM until 8 PM.  This means that he will basically not have one complete day off between work and school.  I have told him to only work Friday - Sunday but he will not agree to it.  He refuses to rely on me to help with his gas and his playtime expenses.  How many 19 year olds would pass up their parents money and suggestion of working less hours?  Not many that I know of. 

I look forward to the times when he gets home at a decent time, comes into my room and lies on the bed just to see how my day was.  There is not a day that goes by that we don't talk at least 2-3 times a day.  It maybe just a brief hey or it can be a long conversation about the events of our day. 

In today's society not many people can say that they always tell the truth, but Justin can.  He is one of those rare individuals that will tell you the truth even if it means that he may get in trouble.   I do not worry about him because when he tells me where he is going to be, that is where he is going to be. 

Everyday I am so grateful that GOD choose me to be his mother.   Justin, thank you for all you do for your Mom and Rob.  We love you more than you will ever know.  Continue doing what you have been doing and I look forward to watching all of your dreams will come true.

Love you to the moon and back, buddy.